2. And because of that glorious sunshine, I dressed up five pre-schoolers and took a walk to my favourite place on earth- the thrift shop. The children loved it- all those "new" toys to look at, all those snow mountains to climb up and down all the way back, and we found a little pink care bear to add to our caring collection.
3.
Brian and I have a meeting to go to tonight. It's about packing. For our kids? No, not this time.
4. With number three in mind-- finding my Birkenstock sandals and summer dresses in the garage. I remember summer days in breezy t-shirt dresses, the sun shining on my weary skin. I anticipate that feeling again....in a short three weeks!
5. Hauling kids and kid equipment through the deep backyard snow and feeling a new strength in my legs. I've been reasonably faithful walking uphill on the treadmill for the past several months. I did not want to arrive in Ecuador with 100% of blubber folds jangling around under my skirts; puffing and gasping up and down mountains and volcanoes and thinking: "Why didn't I prep for this?!"
And one sad. My thighs still look like hell, the cellulite and fat folds steadily advancing and conquering, treadmill notwithstanding. The sad part is how I never get used to it, never really move beyond it, never fully recover from the obsessions, preoccupations, and destructive fantasy life. I cope, I don't allow it to disable me entirely, I grasp constantly towards wellness, acceptance, and a renewed mind. I wear what I want to and what I feel happy and comfortable in. And then I have nightmares, both real and figurative.
I have a feeling I should have ended on a happy note; this feels kind of anti-climatic. How about this? For my first holiday with my husband since our honeymoon, I am not going to a resort where I'll constantly feel dreadful about my physical self. I'm not going to an all inclusive where I'd eat and drink too much and then hate myself. (Although I'd love to do that sometime!). I am going to an ancient city, visiting a live volcano, visiting a super old cathedral, going to a massive indigenous outdoor market, staying in a hotel that offers massage, eating breakfast in the basement that used to be a dungeon, going on lots of hikes, eating empanadas, fresh bread and cheese, and drinking cheap beer.
And I'm completely sure no one will give a rat's ass about my lumpy bits. Maybe not even me.
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7 comments:
I, for one, could not give a rat's ass about the state of your bum. However, I feel sure you think it's lumpier than it is.
In the meantime, to cheap beer!
5 pre-schoolers to the thrift store?
your lumpy bum is made of piles of moxie girl! embrace it
When did blubber folds start to jangle?
yes, the rat's asses do not care, most everyone doesn't care or keep track and herein lies the sadness: i CAN'T GET OVER MY PREOCCUPATION WITH MY SIZE, LUMPS, WORRIES. I want to. It always reassures me to know that rats and people alike don't share my insanity. Well, sometimes I am over it, for stretches of time. But then the bitch comes back!
Cheap beer might just be the hidden golden ticket, I'll definitely give that a whirl.
Peri- the preschoolers that I haul around are solid gold. So good, they never throw fits in public. It helps that they were birthed by someone else, I know from the fruits of my own hidden parts that children are a nightmare. A lovely one that you can't look away from, but still a constant train wreck. Other people's children on the other hand, are little angels.
Yes, the lumpy nether regions carry me through grand adventure! Go lumpy, jangley bits!
Brenda- some people are constantly on me about the joys and freedoms of dancing. They've never seen my bits JANGLE. Sometime after a lot of cheap beer, I'll show you....
Thanks, ladies. You're the bomb.
What an adventure!
I'd have to prepare for three weeks just to bring my five charges to the thrift store.
Rub coconut oil all over yourself. I hear that it works wonders. And nobody can catch you...
I'm 54 and dreadfully out of shape. Presently I'm recording my blood glucose levels and watching them continue to rise.
My hair is thinning at a frightening pace and my eyes are all wonky.
My fillings are diving out of my mouth left and right.
But what do I obsess on?
I have this age spot near my thumb. I HATE it and I'm sure it is all anybody sees.
Oh Joyce. Quito. You lucky, blessed creature. I am quite sure you will LOVE Quito. And Ecuadorians. What gentle, kind, happy people.
My ex-hubby and I spent some months traveling in South America in late1994 (blimey it feels like last year in my mind but nineteen years already?)
We stayed in Quito, with a host family, for 6 weeks, and went to school to learn Spanish every day. What a great city it is. I have magical memories (OK some bad ones too but because of a rotten marriage, not because of the city)...oh and it's where I first heard of and tasted fresh coriander..they put it in so much of their cooking....and old women sold massive bunches of it in the markets...the fragrance of coriander perfumed everything.
And little guinea pigs, (cuy) roasted whole, displayed on sticks... and sold as a favourite fast food...not so pretty but so integral to the market culture....and the pipe music bands..and snake charmers and medicine men with microphones,blasting their spiel across the market goers...oh oh oh you are in for a treat!
Fear not for your wobbly bits...nobody will notice them. And you will be so entranced by what you experience there I think you'll forget any part of your body jiggles. You might even jiggle it willingly to the music. :)
Take a million photos - take an extra memory card or two for your camera..you will want to bung all of it into memory to drool over for years to come.
And yes drink that cheap beer. Eat the empanadas. Embrace it all.
We planned to go and live in Quito, after our travels, and went back to South Africa to gather our belongings, and whilst we were busy closing our lives down in Africa, a war broke out between Peru and Ecuador and so we ended up on Argentina instead....another long story...but oh my, Quito would have been good.
I could write a book on those travels ...will stop here before this becomes a novel too. :)
ps I feel simultaneously flattered, honoured and embarrassed and bashful by your words about my writing and blogging. Thank you.
OMG, Quito. You will love it. I was 22 years younger when I was there, but my bits wobbled about the same as they do now, and I learned all the Spanish synonyms for beautiful, as they were whispered in my ears on the streets, whenever I walked without my male companion. Believe me, if you waste your thoughts on your wobbly bits in Quito, you will be the only one in the country thinking about them.
So you will be over the moon in the Otovallo market. All the textiles and textures. Have lots of fun. I am jealous, but in a 'yippee for Joyce and Brian' kind of way.
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