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Saturday, August 11, 2012

My Beloved

I'm feeling sad for my girls.

All the ones who've been told

you're not.






All the girls whose mothers don't tell them they're







I'm feeling sad for all the girls who didn't believe they are worth it. Who weren't taught not to settle. Who thought they had to just sit down and take it. I'm sad they had no one to speak up for them when they didn't have words. Sad that "NO" wasn't ok. Wasn't nice.

I'm sad that we all believe it a little bit. That we're not enough. That there's always an exercise for that. There's always a "before and after" to strive for. That "before" is not worth living, unworthy of accepting, not too bright, not so pleasing.


I'm sad that strong gets a bad rap. That if you're a feminist, you must be a man-hating blood-thirsty bitch.

I want to take it all back, on behalf of all my sisters. I want to abolish every magazine that pushes product to make us more acceptable, every movie that reminds us that cellulite must not be normal, every reality show that reinforces woman as thin, booby, long-limbed, perfect haired and de-haired in all the right places. I want to tell all the little girls that everything is normal, and that we might be tall and short; lean and round; loud or quiet. That we need and value all of it. That no one prototype exists. That we are all valuable, adequate, equipped for what our lives will bring.

I want to redefine sexuality as a magical thing that spawns from mutual respect, love, attraction. That its not something to be mastered and learned from Cosmo and You9orn. It's not some sort of "skill" that should be learned for that "just in case".

You're worth more than that.

Your cellulite and small breasts don't matter.

It's you that its all about. You are the prize. You are the beloved.


are not defined by those things that are out of your control and ought not be marketed as anything other than that.

My girls, my friends, my sisters. Let's not believe it. Let's speak up instead of playing nice. Let's speak up for one another. Let's stop perpetuating the propoganda about our bodies being


and let's spend more time on



wendz said...

I wonder if society's perceptions and demands will ever change? Or are women doomed to this mindless slavery as long as they are on this planet?

You said it right Joyce - I suppose all we can do is try to make an impact in our own little worlds and hope the ripples move outward and touch other lives.

janice said...

Wowy zowy . . .

I agree with all, and raised my daughter with those sentiments. You said it so eloquently.

I say: Wowy zowy (not so eloquent)

Anonymous said...

Wow.Powerful wow.

Judy said...


Anonymous said...

So true. Thanks for that.


Brandy said...

<3 this one!

Lori said...

Amen Sister!