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Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Hi. My Name is Joyce and I Have Various and Numerous Issues

Dear Seven Readers of the blog I called; "Be kind to your thighs".

It turns out that I am waaaay too dysfunctional to write such a deep and mystical blog with the type of title that indicates that its writer is actually kind to her thighs.

She's not.

She has dark and unpublishable thoughts about various parts of her body. She's actually very messed up- spending hours a day thinking about how treadmills are such a grand idea- how she has one in her basement, how good it would be for her thighs, her heart, and her overall health if she would get her ass back onto that treadmill.

She isn't thinking kind thoughts about her thighs at all.
She's actually sort of a farce.

So, if you're looking around for wisdom, she just noticed that she didn't have any around when it comes to Thigh Management.

Sorry about that. Thanks for giving me a chance though.
If you notice that you're not on the reading list any more, it's because there isn't one.
Your card has been revoked until this writer can scrounge up some kindness.

And that might take some time.

5 comments:

bygeorge! said...

kindness and body parts was too abstract for me to venture on to reading list. I am sorry I didn't brave it ... and don't get confused.. .you R kind. So kind. So be at peace with your kindness. and don't even try to be at peace with your thighs. kindness is for people... not parts of people?
Parts? well, that might require another road trip.
did you wonder why your little knives were in another bag? I came that close to stealing them. How is that for kind!
Thunder Thighs United!
(aka Ginny - at least at this hour)

Roo said...

hi. my name is ruth and i have various and numerous issues...also.

Anonymous said...

I really love you and your authenticness.
VB

Anonymous said...

Oh Joyce. I really love you. I have so many issues, can't even face them all. You're not alone; not that hearing this helps you any. Big hug. Miss you.
.e.

Mary KG said...

awwww, I thot I might gLEAN some wisdom from you... guess I'll have to go back to the magazines with headlines like "loose 50 lb. in 50 minutes". Sorry