A Sample Of Things That Make Me Crazy(er)

Ridiculous things that masquerade as breakfast cereals. REALLY??

I actually have a physical visceral reaction in the cereal aisle at superstore.

But no, I'm not a purist. Even though I know that honey nut cheerios probably are not the best choice of breakfast foods, I buy them. Always have. Always will till my kids are grown up. As for my own early morning choices? Bread and butter make me deleriously happy every single day.

It is wrong on innumerable levels to advertise weight loss schemes on children's television.

That's enough to make me completely crazy any day of the week.

But there's another aspect that absolutely drives me wild. Most mornings while Sam is eating his pb and nutella sandwhich to the melodious tunes of Patrick and Squidword, we get interrupted by this woman who tells us her weight loss story. Then she goes into a whole shpiel about how "diets don't work but blah-dy blah, herbal magic, blahdy-blah lifestyle change".

I nearly choke on my cocoa pebbles every time.

So- how about we teach our children at as early an age as possible that they're all wrong and need to change so that they can become happy, outspoken, popular and successful like their adult role models who don't diet but switch to lifestyles where they swallow pills and record their food choices so that they can finally get it together??

Gol-leeee.

Oh- and don't let me forget the mention the other morning commercial- the one where the giddy young mom swoons over her fancy plastic dial on a fancy little storage container that reminds her what day of the week she put the puree carrots into the fridge.

Ever heard of green painter's tape??

Here's the other thing that fills me with amazement every morning.

If you buy this product; any old piece of fermenting vegetation that you grind through it instantly becomes organic, nutrient rich baby food.

Really. The television says so.

It's just that miraculous.

And finally.

When you see these commercials for Charmin bath tissue- what images are conjured up in your mind??

Like... Fewer pieces of WHAT, exactly?!
Ewwwww.

Coming soon: Things That Make Me Happy(er)