Thursday, October 18, 2007

All That Glitters Befits a Cougar

Cougars, prepare the way for the alpha Cougar, the Great Alluring One. Her time in the chambers is nearly complete, for her ladies in waiting have bestowed upon her many gifts from afar.

Thus far, her fingers are well adorned, but her cheeks are found lacking.

The request has been made that any prospective apprentices might at this time present their case before council. Alpha Cougar is ready to receive considerations for three women who would henceforth be formally invited to the third party of November: The Party Before The Party.

This is an exclusive event, closed to the public. Only the three chosen ones will join our Lady of Forty to share in the great ceremony of the Glueing-On-Of-The-Nails about which generations of cougars before us have woven their legends.

Ceremony is to commence on November 10, an hour before the previously announced event: The Great Cougar Party to celebrate the first forty years of our esteemed one.

State your case in the comments, and they will be presented for consideration.

Words to study before November 10, 7:00 pm.

*muffin top
* fishnet
*stiletto heel


Anonymous said...

I would love to attend your cougar party, but being I am a bit far from your house, I won't plead my case.

Muffin Top? I never heard of this term, I googled it and immediately laughed out loud. Thanks for the laugh!

Anonymous said...

I not only know what a muffi top, I have one!

"Wish I could be there.

Nancy said...

Ah, if only the distance that doth separate this lowly cougar from thy great one were less than a fortnight, it would allow this ever humble one to present her case before thy great queen. But alas, it shall not be so. For thy distance is too great, the chasm too deep, the bridge too long, the mountain too high. It cannot be overcome by such a lowly cougar as I.

gloria said...

Oh most high and deserving Alpha Cougar, please consider the plea of a lesser and much less beautiful Cougar in training. If you could but find it in your generous heart, which is nestled betwixt the most beautiful and bountious bossom known to mankind, to take this poor undeserving young Cougar underneath your wing and mentor me in the ways of the true Cougar, I would be eternally grateful and indebted to you. Show me the ways of the Cougar, teach me the methods of your stealth and craft, so that I can one day hope to be half the genius that you are.

Roo said...

ahh! those nails....

there are no words.

Christy said...

I found a set of leopard print martini glasses..took everything in me not to mail them to you for your party.

But I figured that a box of shards of leopard printed glass wouldn't be the greatest birthday present. ;o)