Friday, September 08, 2006

Reflections

I had reason to flip through some old photo albums this afternoon, and have the oppurtunity to pause and reflect back on the past 20 or so years of my life.

That's about how long I've been trying to be an adult now. Thus far, I must say, the pictures confirmed what I've suspected all along: its been a good life. Not every picture was necessarily a party, or a really rib-tickler, but most of them have precious and unique life seasons associated with them.

The early pictures of me and Brian freely reflect the silly, free-spirited love we have always enjoyed. Not to pretend that every moment of our time together in the last 16 years has been sheer bliss, but there's no denying it-- HANGING ONTO HIM WAS A GOOD DECISION!

By the end of my short time of reminiscance this afternoon, there were two distinct photo categories: ones that reflected good choices, or had some redeeming value, and secondly, those which made me smack myself in the head and wish I could redeem time, and go back to think with the correct end of my anatomy.

This is where I like being almost forty.

I'm not delusional enough to pretend I've never done foolish things, but I am smart enough to decide not to celebrate them, not to give them a permanent spot in my psyche, or even just on my bookshelf.I took those stupid pictures, which made me feel like a stupid girl, and I threw them in the stupid garbage. It gave me a great, cathartic burst of pleasure to hurl an entire album into the trash.

And now I'm holding onto the good.

8 comments:

Roo said...

:)
i love you!
me too...it was very empowering one fall day - not too long ago - to lite a LARGE FIRE in the back yard of my parents house and ROAST a few stacks of photos. and unmemorable memories!!

yah! love your wedding photo - cinderella! xo

andrea said...

These are *real* photos. Fantastic. I think the one of you and Brian is very symbolic somehow -- your hair looks identical and I can't really tell where one ends and the other begins! (And is that an '80s perm? I have *too* many of those photos. I permed my hair until it fell out.)

Anonymous said...

You go girl. I'm proud of you.

joyce said...

hee hee. I showed our kids this photo and asked them, "Did you know that your father and I used to be conjoined at the head?"
Yes, indeedy. Brian can boast those curls without toni, whereas I had to chemicalize them onto my head. So cute, this couple who look like fraternal twins.....
People used to think he was my brother, then notice us holding hands, then hope that they were wrong....

svea said...

love the pics! woo hoo. I had my own dumping party 3 years ago, feels great doesn't it? By the way you and brian are way too sexy together

Anonymous said...

Mica!!!there is no guessing who his parents are.

Cherrypie said...

You haven't aged a bit. What's the secret?

Anonymous said...

Oh, how scary. I look at your hair and think "I love it! That's how I want mine to look." I'm surprized to hear your hairstyle being mocked. Are the 80's really that long ago? "Old" people are making more sense all the time. YIPES!