I think its starting to come together for me. I've been wishing that I was just a little bit "type A" so that when people come to interview me as a prospective daycare provider for their children, I could have a tidy handbook to hand them. Or, at the very least, a print-out.
One of the main problems with this good intention is that I think in "dribbles and blurbs, and occasional splashes of colour", so having to come up with something resembling intelligence and competency can be a bit of a challenge.
This morning, after another family came to observe whether or not I was a freak, or could possibly be trusted with their child, a few "policies" came to me.
1. I try to stay out of the liquor cabinet until after lunch.
2. Healthy snacks are a priority. I regularily set out giant bowls of fortified cereals such as fruit loops,pebbley bam bams, and cocoa crunchy trans fat balls.
3. We watch tv whenever possible. I especially like Jerry Springer, as it reinforces powerful interpersonal relationship strategies.
4. I encourage the children to play alone in the basement, so that they can learn survival skills by lighting fires with the help of the hot water tank's pilot light.
5. Running with scissors promotes dexterity.
6. I don't put much stock in all that "book learnin' ". We save a lot of time by just going straight to the movies.
I really think that things are going to begin to come together for me now.
7 comments:
7. Violence is not tolerated, it is taught as a skill. It teaches children resilience.
8. I do not shout, when screaming is a much more effective method of communicating over the top of their voices.
I don't know how you do it, Joyce. I'd have gone into anaphylactic shock by now, let alone break out in hives.
You guys are the best! Are you willing to work for 44 cents an hour? You seem to have all the necessary qualifications.
The thing about screaming is all the lozenges I go through. At this income, one has to watch the little things...
Joyce! You're in Canada, right? I'm in Canada too! You're HIRED! You can start looking after my kid tomorrow!
44 cents an hour sounds about right for someone so obviously over-qualified.
Heck, I'd do it for a glass of red wine and a bag of doritos (see rule #2)
9. If the kids get too hyper I give them something to calm down-wine, a tranquilizer, or sleeping pill. Then you will have a happy day care person when you pick up your kids. The parents will be up all night-but who cares as long as you are happy.
First time to your site-I like it.
10. Lunch consists of day-old bread and water. Lots of water; it's too expensive to keep running into the city to buy the day-old bread. Besides, water keeps you hydrated and keeps all those various parts of your body working like they should.
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